Sunday, February 13, 2011

Old Golfers Never Die: Asking for Forgiveness, They Just Play Through the 19th Hole

All golfers should live so long as to be this kind of old golfer.  He attended Sunday Service on a bad weather day and toward the end of the service, the Minister asked the congregation, "How many of you have forgiven your enemies?" .... 80% of the hands went up.  The Minister repeated his question....after a moment of silence...all responded this time, except Walter Barnes, an old avid golfer who only attended church on bad weather days.  The Minister said, "Mr. Barnes, it's obviously not a good morning for golf; though, it is good to see you this morning. Are you willing to forgive your enemies?"  Mr. Barnes replied gruffly, "I don't have any."  The Minister replied, "Mr Barnes that is very unusual. How old are you?"  "Ninety-eight, Mr Barnes replied."  The congregation at this point stood up and clapped their hands.  "Oh, Mr Barnes, would you please come down in front and tell us all how a person can live ninety-eight years and not have an enemy in the world", the Minister said.  So the old golfer tottered down the aisle, stopped in front of the pulpit, turned around, faced the congregation, and simply said, "I've outlived all the s---s of b-----h's" , and tottered back to his seat.  AMEN.

Speaking of FORGIVENESS.  I have a new understanding to this word.  Golf is so full of surprises. 
Forgiveness....Definition: In golf, "forgiveness" refers to construction and design elements in golf clubs that lessen the effects of bad swings and poor contact with the ball. A golf club that has these features is said to offer a lot of forgiveness (or to "be very forgiving"). Clubs that offer lots of forgiveness are classified as game-improvement clubs. Why use the word "forgiveness"? Because these designs elements forgive the golfer for some of his mistakes. Does forgiveness make bad shots go away? Not hardly. Improving your swing, making better contact with the ball (the sweet spot), is the only way to make bad shots rare. But forgiveness can make a shot struck off-center travel almost as far as one with perfect contact; it can help get a ball a little higher in the air. It reminds me of the day I tried a new Taylormade Driver at Golfsmith.  I asked the pro why this club was so special and he explained the value of forgiveness.  I am all into that.....FORE!!!

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